


the song remains the same

by rhealitycheck



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Hunger Games Setting, Angst, Drama, F/M, I made myself sad, Implied/Referenced Character Death, I’m new to this, Mikasa Ackerman & Levi Are Siblings, i don’t know how to tag, i promise to write happier fic next time
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-09
Updated: 2020-02-09
Packaged: 2021-02-28 00:01:52
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,032
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22624483
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rhealitycheck/pseuds/rhealitycheck
Summary: When he called her name and she looked back at him, he quickly realized that her eyes had the same look as they did a year ago when she stood on stage the day of the reaping and it tied knots in his stomach.It's happening again.She's leaving again. And he's helpless again.
Relationships: Mikasa Ackerman & Levi, Mikasa Ackerman/Eren Yeager
Comments: 1
Kudos: 44





	the song remains the same

**Author's Note:**

> This was a very old fic I wrote, I think it was back when the Hunger Games movies first came out. So, it’s very old and very, very terribly written. I never did post it because I was too shy (and for good reason, it’s awful before the edit) but I stumbled upon it a few days ago and said fuck it. So here it is.

Eren could always read Mikasa. No matter how hard she tried to conceal her emotion, he would always be able to see through her facade. He's been living with her since they were both nine; he was bound to understand her more than anyone else, perhaps even herself.

It was her eyes which always gave her away every time.

The way the corner of her eyes twitched when she lied or how she blinked just a tiny bit faster when she was unsure of some thing. However, most of her emotions were conveyed through the black of her irises. Some of these hints were more apparent while others were a little harder to distinguish. But it was never a problem for Eren; even the littlest change of glint in her eyes he could pretty much identify easily, like the lighter shade of grey her irises turned when she stood on the reaping platform as a tribute showed how scared she actually was, even though she didn't and probably would never admit.

He could always read her no matter what. Which was why it bothered him so much when he first was reunited with her when she came home from Sina and he couldn't read whatever she was feeling through the dull ache of her curtained eyes. They were always storms so full of emotions and this was living with it having died down.

Living with that fact was painful each and everyday of it all. Eren could only remember bits and parts of the one year he had to bear with not seeing the same usual bright Mikasa. Mainly because there was not much happening.

It's not that their days weren't eventful, what with the moving to a bigger and fancier house and the grand victor tour he had accompanied her through for the past month, but it was just the fact that he had felt like strangers with the girl he had always known since nine. Also the fact that he was already used to associating their memories with any particular remarkable things she did. Like how he vividly remembered the crooked smile she had the day she lied about accidentally knocking over one of his mom's flower vase to cover for him or the way her bright eyes reflected the twinkling stars up above when they risk crossing the field past curfew to watch the meteor shower. Now that she kept to herself and no longer seemed to be able to express her emotions well, he had no way of organizing those memories.

And it was as if time had stopped for the both of them. For he had not lived for the past year, for he had no memory of any of it.

"Eren," she spoke and he looked to his side, to where she was perched on the edge of their couch, eyes looking at him expectantly but absent of any worry he had became so familiar with. "Are you okay?"

Mentally slapping himself, he slung a hand over her shoulder and pulled her back so she had her back against the couch and she just looked up at him in return—no sign of surprise whatsoever at his uncharacteristic gesture, he noted bitterly. At his own lack of words, he considered not saying anything but eventually settled on a simple: yeah, just a little worried.

To which she gave a small nod as a form of acknowledgement to before taken to leaning against his shoulder.

Even as they sat next to each other now, with her hair tickling the skin on his neck and their tele flashing the colors of the familiar announcement screen, he still couldn't tell if he would remember this moment at later times. Perhaps not even in five minutes when King Fritz was done announcing the so-called very important announcement.

"Carla, Levi, the program's gonna start soon." The Colonel called from his spot next to the couch where his wheelchair was positioned. At this, Carla made a muffled response of how she just had to turn off the oven from the kitchen while Levi let out his usual response of incoherent grunting noises from somewhere in the next room.

Just as the Colonel was about to wheel over to get Levi himself, Armin walked into the room with a boiling pot of tea in his hand. "My, Armin, whatever do you have brewing for today?"

"Darjeeling. The lady next door came over earlier to gift it to me, said she acquired some from a merchant over at another district." Armin handed an empty cup for his grandpa to hold, then as he carefully poured the still steaming liquid in, his eyes flickered to Mikasa. "She said it was to celebrate the one year since Mikasa became a victor."

Eren cringed at the sound of that but the girl beside him remained passive. It was horrible how people could go about it so casually, how they praised and congratulate Mikasa for coming out as a victor as if it was something to be proud of. There was absolutely nothing worth celebrating about coming out alive from a bloodbath, where you were forced to dirty your hands by killing other innocent people just to make it out of that hell. Even if she did come back from all of that, there was no doubt that a piece of her had died. And how indifferent Mikasa about the whole thing just went to show how nobody ever wins the game; they only survived it, and living with the scars they had to bear for the rest of their life was the only thing left for them.

"Are you brats not even gonna give Arlert a good third wheeling spot on the couch? Scoot over." He must've gotten lost in his thought for a while because he didn't notice that Levi was already in the room (eventually deciding that the taste of a new type of tea was worth having his ears blessed with King Fritz's bullshit for five minutes), hands crossed over his chest as he stared down at them in distaste.

Mikasa inched away from Eren to make space for him but it was only after Levi had had his tea and was sitting comfortably on one of the chair with a leg over the other did Armin sat down between the two of them. He sat the pot down on their coffee table, somewhere a little further away from Eren's feet which was resting on the table.

The image of King Fritz popped up just as Carla entered the room and from the corner of his eyes, Eren could visibly see Levi's feature darkening significantly. His cup stopping mid-air, he glanced over at his younger sister who kept her eyes straight on, staring at the television screen as if it was the most natural thing in the world. " _Ladies and Gentlemen, this is the 25th year of the Hunger Games. It was written in the charter of the games in every 25 years there would be a Quarter Quell to keep fresh, for each new generation, the memory of those who died in the uprising against The Three Daughters of Ymir._ ”

As the king took a short pause to look at his notes, Levi scoffed, "Tap your feet even louder why don't you, Jaeger? See if you'll get more sponsors in the next Hunger Games with your tap dancing."

That earned him a glare from Carla and even someone as crass as him was aware as to how insensitive his words was but since apology wasn't Levi's thing, he settled on shutting up and sipping on his tea in silence.

But the thing was, Eren didn't even realize that he had been tapping his feet. It was an anxious reflex, if he had to guess.

" _Each Quarter Quell is distinguished by games of a special significance and now on this 25th anniversary of our defeat of the rebellion, we celebrate the 1st Quarter Quell as a reminder that even the strongest cannot overcome the power of Maria, Rose, and Sina._ ”

There was another pause in the king’s speech and Eren found himself leaning forward in his seat, staring intently at the screen. It was the first ever Quarter Quell; no one knew what was to come and everyone was waiting with baited breath in gut churning anticipation. Praying to any god that may be listening, to let their family weather this cruel fate another year. 

But the gods must’ve been conspiring against them.

“ _On this 1st Quarter Quell games, the male and female tribute are to be reaped from the existing pool of victors in each district, regardless of age, gender_ —”

They were still going on and about with the program; some excessively cheery reporter took over the screen once King Fritz was done with his speech and rambled about how it was a very interesting turn of event and that she was looking forward to the first quarter quell in history and so on and so forth. But other than the sound of cheers resounding from the tele, everyone in the room had fell silent upon hearing that. Even the faintest sound was that soft shudder of a teacup; whose one it was Eren didn't have enough time to figure out because Armin screeched in panic.

"Mikasa, are you okay!?"

Mikasa looked paler than Eren had ever seen her—paler than even the day she watched her mom being killed live on the television, dare he said. She was shaking, terribly so that even her tea was spilling from the cup resting on her thigh and onto the white of her dress, leaving behind an ugly stain of brown. When he called her name and she looked back at him, he quickly realized that her eyes had the same look as they did a year ago when she stood on stage the day of the reaping and it tied knots in his stomach.

It's happening again.

She's leaving again. And he's helpless again.

Eren reached over, about to say something comforting because at that point, Mikasa looked like she was about to bolt, leaving to go anywhere but here. But a sound of glass breaking and something porcelain hitting the floor cut his train of thoughts before he could think of something. He caught the distinct reflection of Levi in Mikasa's widening black irises and turned at the sound of his mom concerned yelling to see red.

Levi had his whole hand covered in deep crimson shade of blood, his white shirt mimicked that of the other Ackerman's, stained brown with the liquid that once sit inside the tiny cup he crushed with his bare hand. He brushed past Carla who was trying to look at his wound and crossed the room to make way to meet with his sister. Resting on his knee to meet her eyes, he transferred the blood to her white dress via a touch on her shoulder. "Listen kid, I'm not gonna lie to you. Everyone's gonna be out to get us out there but I promise you, I'll get you out safely."

It was a goodbye.

For it was only a matter of time that the pair of siblings would sit on that train again, headed for the Sina as a tribute nonetheless. For it was certain that when the announcer reach in to pull out names from the almost empty bowl, the only name that would come up would be theirs, and only the Ackermans. And Mikasa understood it well for she cried so hard, Eren couldn't even see the tears that welled up in her eyes as she gripped tightly to Levi and sang a lullaby of all her fears to her brother's shirt.

Her crying was the sound that would remain ringing in Eren's ear, even after the rest of them were all gone and out of the room, even when he's sitting alone in the room with no other noise than the low hum of the tele. The sound that would ultimately be the reason why he threw his own tea cup at the flashing screen of the tele, effectively rendering it dead.

**Author's Note:**

> I have a prequel to this story tucked away somewhere but I’m not sure, I’d have to search for it. It details the events that transpired the day of Mikasa’s first reaping, revealed why Eren was helpless the first time, and explained more about why the Hunger Games started in this universe ( **spoiler alert!** it definitely has something to do with the Ackermans). If I find it, I might consider finishing it and posting it here just for the hell of it. I can’t promise much though.


End file.
